Three days since I just decided to quit having my pre workout caffeine and definately no regrets. I’ve always been into minimizing my poisons and since I don’t have that many in my life I thought “hey what about that caffeine!”.

Now, I’ve never been a caffeine junkee, always kept my dosages pretty small and only pre workout, however I train two times a day six days a week and I never stop or get ill and thus naturally get stopped, so I was putting that stress on my body consistently. As I was reflecting upon it I just realized this:

If my heart rate is lower because I use no caffeine to spike it, I will then push harder to reach the optimum training heart rate. Pushing harder muscle wise instead of letting the heart spin its wheels means more effort. More effort equals higher calorie expenditure. That was the selling argument for me! I mean, why make it easier for me when what I need to do to get elite fit all around is to work harder.

I’ve now accomplished six cardio sessions without caffeine and leg training and back workout. It’s a new kind of feeling.

I don’t get those nice kicks, but on the other hand I don’t feel as drained afterwards. I feel my muscles work harder in a good way, I feel very “calm”. I don’ feel more tired. I don’t have head aches but I never had any so what do I know…

I am doing this because I want to prove to myself that I don’t need to rely on any outer stimulants, no outer inspiration, no outer motivation. I can train harder just by focusing mentally on the task.

I never saw myself have a Rockstar before every training session for the rest of my life and when I see an end to something I always end it directly instead of waiting. It was time to say goodbye to the only little energy help I had. Now I actually don’t feel more sluggish. I feel good.  And I do like being able to tell all those who say I train hard because I use energy drinks: Nope, no caffeine: I rely on nothing but myself.

So, what about YOU?

All my life I’ve been into reducing. Reducing negativity, reducing waste of time, reducing nonconstructive reasoning and reflections. When I’ve felt an addiction or obsession about something I’m always inclined to delete it from my life. Maybe it’s an inborn scare for losing what is precious to me and by not letting myself get attached to it I rather let it go voluntarily.

I refuse to be a slave to my needs of different things, different routines and circumstances. I need to be in control of my life, I cannot let circumstances control it. To walk through life passively with an attitude of “well, I guess it was not meant to be” is not what I do. I steer the ship in the direction I am going for and even though the waves and winds might shift me off a bit to the right or the left, I still reach the destination as long as I keep my head up straight and forward.

This morning I felt that “be careful what you wish for”. I suddenly got anxious when I once again realized I was knocking on that door I’ve been wanting to be opened for me. Mark my words in the passive here: I waited for it to be opened, not me opening the door. Some matters are just matters about time. You cannot rush it. Your time is maybe not right now, it might be later. Today I felt “now is my time” and I did not know whether or not to be excited or be scared and curse myself for desiring something that was now soon coming my way.

It’s not the first time I’ve been doing all in my power to attract what I want. It’s scary when you come close to it. But here I live by my mother’s wise words: do not be afraid! Do not ever be afraid! I’ve done those “I am so scared I’m gonna die but I know I have to do this” and they are the best personal experiences in my life leading me closer to my goals, but still, it’s scary.

The worst enemy is the one you have inside you. You know when your mind starts to spin and you become afraid of your own thoughts and what power is in them? When you really truly believe in the power of the mind you suddenly see no limits on what you can do with your life. What is the most scary thought here is YOU are most likely the one who’s gonna stop yourself. Not circumstances because those you can steer around. not people either because those you can avoid. You. You are the stopping force.

So, when I am facing new challenges and my first reaction is “Oh NO!!! Why did I have to wish for this???” and I get thrown out of my comfort zone I get angry with myself for suddenly wishing I did not accomplish anything. What kind of holding back is that… wishing for same old same old. But then I ask myself “do I want to be here doing the same thing in 15 years from now still looking for that perfect time where I’m gonna break free and follow all my dreams?”. No. The time is Now, not later. I act on now NOW, not later because later might never come.

I tend to underestimate my willingness to adapt to challenges I face. I always perceive myself as set in my ways, a creature of habit and routine. Some times I ask myself what I would do if I had to change and my nature is to say NO, but then when I do come to crossroads where I have to pick my battles, I go in the right direction even if the new direction is tougher, harder.

Windows of opportunities open up only when doors are being shut. It’s like a labyrinth: if one way does not lead me where I want I need to turn around and go for another. Never quit or assume it’s too hard.

My life has always been a “adapt or die” and when I found a new comfort zone I got granted a new challenge I first cursed then found out to be a blessing in disguise. After a few rounds of that I saw the pattern and embraced for what it was: a push to climb higher on the ladder instead of being happy where I am.

Training and building muscle is a process of adapt or die. The body builds more muscle to protect itself from the wear and tear. Life is the same way. You are given challenges that wear you and tear you down so you can come back with a vengeance, stronger than before.

I don’t take things for granted and when I do I am quick to remind me that everything can be taken away from me any time, any day. Instead of worrying about the obvious way of how life works as in taking away and giving back, I focus on appreciate all immaterial things I have and that nobody can nothing can take away from me. My thoughts, my memories, my plans, my dreams, my goals, they are all impossible to kill, erase or delete unless I allow it.

Every challenge I am given I see it as a reason to grow stronger. I refuse to feel like it’s unfair because there is no such thing as fairness! I won’t walk through life with the attitude of “I am entitled to this and that” or “I deserve it”. I don’t deserve anything more than anyone else. I work hard for it, I do all in my powers to do and keep doing what I love, but no way do I expect it’s going to be that way forever. As my experience tells me, when I hit a comfort zone I will be given a new challenge!

I feel strong. Very strong. When I see how I adapt to changes and just do whatever it takes without wanting to quit or wanting an easy way out, I feel empowered. At those times I do feel like a true fighter. Immortal. Invincible.

I was not born ripped, muscular, lean lean and all that all the time, non stop, since forever and til forever. I had a vision about what I wanted to look like, I wanted to look like Arnold but in a female form, I wanted to have a six pack of abs and cuts in my shoulders, no saddle bag thighs or jiggly arms. I knew that to have all that with my kind of body I had to do more cardio than everyone else, more training than most, diet stricter than anyone else and do it for very long time.

My body said “ok Lady, THAT’s the body you want? Well, then you are up for a challenge because I’m not naturally going for that!” and I accepted it because I had the right mindset. I knew that if I wanted something that did not come to me naturally I had to work harder, way harder to get it. I had my times when I complained about it until I finally realized that I was the driving force behind whipping my body to the way I wanted, to mold it and shred it the way I liked. It was never a walk in the park.

I did find it unfair when “everyone else” did half the amount of cardio and cheated on their diets and were not as consistent as I was lost fat and got in contest shape in a few weeks time. For me, losing that last pound took forever. It was just the way it was and always had been. I was ok with working way harder than those girls to get where I wanted. And when they got “fat” again post contest I did not. I was consistent. I was ultra tough on myself. Because I knew my body was always waiting for a chance to gain weight.

So, when you see my pictures, it’ a fake illusion that it comes so easy to me. Seems like I was always lean, BORN that way, right? Well, you don’t see my daily life. you don’t see all cardio sessions, all workouts I do. Since it’s in most people’s minds ok to “cheat” once in a while, in my world it’s not. It was never an option for me with my goals, so I stopped fooling myself, dug in deeper, kicked it harder, trained myself to be disciplined 100%.

Don’t fall into believing what I do and did was a walk in the park. I’ve been serious and dedicated since I started. It was never in my body’s nature to be lean, to have this muscle mass. I did it, I changed it, body and mind had to adapt or die.

There is no other way than Fighter Diet for me. And it truly is a FIGHTER diet and FIGHTER spirit. I did not have the genetics to be lean 365 days of the year, but I wanted it. And I wanted to do it without taking any easy ways out. I was set on doing it the hardcore old school stubborn way of doing it.

I meet a lot of women who diet so hard for shows just to blow up post contest. Not just from eating but from restricting themselves for months and using fatburners that are not OTC but they think it’s safe because their trainers say they are safe and “everyone is on them”. For what are you doing it: a little bikini show trophy?

There are no shortcuts in being lean and shredded and not an asparagus 365 days a year. if that’s what you think and that’s the work ethic you have to work with, well, FIGHTER DIET IS NOT FOR YOU.

What does a contest prep diet do for you? It gets you cut, shredded with maintained or slightly increased muscularity.

What does my Fighter Diet Concept do for you? It gets you cut, shredded with increased muscularity as long as you keep working hard with weights to stimulate your body to gain muscle mass.

The big difference is not about what’s ON the plan but what takes place AFTER you stop following it. If you have no plan on what to do after your contest is over you will regain the fat and then some. How many people do you know who stay in that awesome show after show time is over? Most likely almost none, they all go on post contest binges.

Fighter Diet is NOT a contest prep diet that ends the day you have competed and going back to normal. it’s a LIFESTYLE you keep on using as long as you want to be lean all the time.

Look at my pictures. Do I look off season? Does it seem like I need to go on a contest diet for my photo shoots? I don’t, I don’t DIET down. I stricten up by NOT having big refeeds one week out from an important shoot etc, but that’s about it.

If you want to STAY in shredded condition you need to KEEP on following a diet that supports your mission. Going up and down in weight is not good for getting rid of stubborn fat, not good for your metabolism, not good for your mental well-being AND it costs a lot of money to have two sets of wardrobe: for the FAT you and the LEAN you.

There is no reason to walk around hungry ALL the time just because you are gonna compete. Hey, is that not setting you up for trouble since that usually leads to cheating for most people who happen to be less disciplined than elite diet soldiers…

you do NOT have to shrink your stomach daily by eating small, small portions of food. There are good reasons to stuff yourself with the right food: your BODY senses your satiation and TELLS your brain you have enough energy and calories.

It’s a pain in the butt to be hungry for months. it’s unhealthy to think about the day after the show where you gonna have ice cream and pizza and cookies and french fries from day one on your prep til the show time is over. It’s food obsession and it’s not gonna make you lean for the long run.

Fighter Diet is a lifestyle for those who want to look like you are gonna hit the stage ANY TIME, ANY DAY, NOW, TOMORROW or WHENEVER.

“ diet like you wanna get ripped, exercise like you wanna build huge Muscles” “if you got a lot of weight to lose, and I mean A LOT, I recommend building your diet on the amount of veggies/protein for your TARGET weight and not on your extra-pounds…”

“yeah fish sticks grow on the bottom of the ocean and pasta comes from the spaghetti bush” “Have u ever met someone who weight trains who shakes hands like a dead fish?”

“when someone writes “I cut out dairy recently” in a pursuit to get leaner I always wonder if the person in question added calcium complex with more than calcium to make up for the sudden decrease in this bone building mineral.”

“In some exercises I see regress the longer I train. First it freaked me out, thought I got weaker and weaker. But now I realize with experience and paying attention to perfection it’s just me hitting the right muscles only and not “everything that can move this piece of weight”, and thus the weight gets tougher…”

“I guess it took about 5 years for me to reach my genetic “limit”; when I look At pics I has the size down after 5 years and I’m talking lean mass not just size. After that came fine tuning, maturing. Getting leaner and leaner but lighter!”

“I realized I was bored with back training cause I forgot to innovate… So today I did and back was happy and got pumps in other fibers than usual. Good call to alter, If so just a switch between two grips”

“If u have a hard time building muscle you most likely lose the muscle easily too. Translates into you can’t just cardio cardio to get leaner; u won’t have the lean mass required to support it without turning into an asparagus!”

“Don’t confuse heavy for big weights. A tiny pound in the right angle with the right lever with the right form can be devilishly intensely heavy”

“When something is hard in a workout my instinct is to do it until it’s easy”

I don’t know what drives me or what fires my mind to do what I do. I don’t know why I ended up with my mind set on what I want to accomplish. I have a list, I have a mental list on tasks I need to say “I did this” on, but it evolves over time, it changes from day to day, year to year.

I don’t know where all the desire comes from, I don’t know who inspired me or was the trigger. And I don’t look for it in the past to find out. I have an urge to follow my heart, some times I try to figure out what caused this flame to set on fire. I have no clue.

Nothing and everything motivates me, but it seems there are no external stimuli anymore. It’s a kind of “buzz” or a “sound” I feel like I am following, sometimes blindly. When things happen I know they happen for a reason.  I’ve been through chaotic times and all I knew was I should be calm and keep going and not worry. Some times I know where things lead before they have even started. Quite often I know the end before the start is initiated.

I think I got it from my mother. Not the motivation but this internal wanderer personality. I am a loner, I thrive on being left alone with my thoughts and my reflections. I can feel at times I have a few strings I am pulling and the puppets are different Paulines. I pull them all into one direction, forward, up towards my goals… Which are blurry but sharp at the same time. I pull these strings knowing it steers me to where I want even though it might seem like the opposite. I have a plan, I have a strategy. I sense the path, I sense when I drift in the wrong direction and it gets me back on track.

I know this was a long ramble, but it’s what’s on my mind today.

A fit body is the result of regular exercise and appropriate food for your goals. Eating too much of even healthy food will inhibit fat loss, yet stimulate muscle growth. Eating less than you expend will generate fat loss but also slow muscle growth. Consistency in eating the right foods several times a day, all days of the week, is way more important than any pre or post workout shake you believe you must have in order to get results.

Having a protein shake before training is great, having one post workout is splendid too. Adding carbs for sure help keep your energy levels high and improve the rate of recovery, but since it does mean more calories on your menu it can lead to a halt in fat loss or weight loss.

Now if you are smart you just make sure that one of those meals you have during the day happens to be consumed BEFORE training or AFTER training. You can have a shake instead of a meal. Just don’t add extra meals on top of your diet unless you WANT the extra calories to gain weight, gain muscle.

When you want to change your body, this is my recommendation: diet like you wanna get ripped, exercise like you wanna build huge muscles! Don’t go on a super low calorie diet, it will just bring your metabolism down, but if you are not that big a person you might not need as many calories as we wish we did….

When I was younger I used to surf the internet checking message boards and what people wrote about me. I remember how it hurt to read about my so called obvious drug abuse, my steroid-face, and how I just had no idea about what I was doing. With time I stopped looking for people’s comments, I stopped clicking links sent to me from “friendly” fans who wanted me to justify myself and stand up for my beliefs on these boards. For so long did I try to defend myself, prove to everyone how wrong they were, so much energy I gave all these haters who had never ever met me, never talked to me, yet they knew exactly my agenda and history.

It takes a lot of mental toughness to endure false accusations without turning bitter. It takes a lot of persistence and positive thinking when all your work and writing is being smashed by the “know it all public eye” who tell me to stop writing because I write like I’m a third grade student who has never seen or learned any grammar at all. This comes from Americans who most of the time don’t know any other languages than their own….

Behind all these computer screens people sit in private, don’t need to back anything up and if they do have to they can just research and copy paste a link to references and science notes and get away with it. yet they claim I know nothing.

I am cool with not knowing anything about fitness, nutrition, training. It’s fine, I know nothing about cardio training or how to get better at it. I have no nutritional knowledge, I don’t know anything about how to stay in shape because I just happen to do it, but I don’t have the science… Does this make you feel better? Does this make you feel you know more than me? terrific, kudos to you!

If I make you so pissed off, so agitated, why do you spend your precious time reading what I write?If you have better solutions and have results to show, why do you bother reading my rambles? because you get inspired? by what: lack of knowledge? Lack of education? Lack of proof of knowledge? lack of the college and university degrees you have that I don’t?

I wonder, if you are so great at training and practicing what you preach, how come you don’t show it? Why are you just as fat and out of shape as someone who claims to know just as little as I do about fitness?

I ask of you to please lead by example instead of putting people down. If you have a problem with how I write, why do you read it? You got some compulsive issues which means you just HAVE to? Like an addiction? Does it make you happy to build frustration about me and what I do?

I’ve always gone against the stream. It’s not new to me and I am happy I am rugged and rough around the edges. All you do by hating is proving me I am doing something right here. Like it or not.

But, if I were you.. And I detested someone so much I would write whole essays about this or that person on message boards… I would definately check my priority list and get a life of my own instead of trying to downplay someone else’s. Use the hate for something constructive instead of wasting time on trying to delete my existence!

This is a very good quote from TR Goodman who is the founder of PRO CAMP SPORT:

“Ask 10 different people what it means to be “fit,” and you’ll receive 10 different answers. But from an objective perspective, being “fit” has cosmetic, functional and health elements. Being perfectly “fit” means that all elements are functioning optimally and are in balance with each other.

For many people, being “fit” means being focused on just one element, such as building muscle or striving for an ultra-low body fat percentage. Unfortunately, this single-minded focus results in less than optimal fitness – and often injury.

For instance, carb depleting for extended periods of time will bring your body fat down, but it’s not healthy. Conversely, the Atkins diet has proven to help people lose weight, but it’s not healthy. Some people think that being able to run a marathon means they are “fit.” In reality, marathon training is not healthy and typically results in injury. Doing yoga will make you really flexible and spiritual, but if you get too flexible you will have problems with your joint stability, making you less “fit”. Conversely, adding muscle to your physique will make your body look better, but if it throws your body out of proper alignment you will become too bulky, lose your ability to function and become less “fit”.”

PRO CAMP SPORT